9 weeks to go..

Tisha:

Reality is starting to set in that this is actually going to happen and it is scary. The fundraising for me seems to be going very slow. I know it will all work out in the end but this is scary because if I don't get the $2300 raised I am not going to be able to participate. Like Becky said in her previous Blog it is harder for us because we are so far apart. If we were closer we may be able to do fundraising events together. It is also hard for me personally because in the middle of all this I lost my job, my husband got a new job and we were relocated. While all of these things have turned out to be blessings it is has been hard to focus on this walk. One great thing that has come from this is that I have also been trying to be healthier. So far I have lost about 25 pounds and I am hoping to lose more. Brandon and I purchased an elliptical machine when we moved here and so far I have used it everyday. Because of the move the weight loss has slowed down but I am heading back in the right direction now and hoping to see more weight loss before the walk. It is going to be a long walk to be carrying all this fat around with me! :) I recently watched the safety video that the 3 day sent out and it freaked me out a little more. They said a lot of people get blisters and dehydrated. They said we should definitely be walking a lot right now. I need to step up my game! I also am going to try and get fitted for shoes before the walk to avoid the blisters. They also say changing socks in the middle of the walk also helps, my aunts said they didn't get blisters. I hope I can say that too...ouch. I will definitely be packing band aids and socks.

I have to say my family is always so supportive and without them we wouldn't be able to do this. I just found out my aunt Pam and cousin Amanda are going to try to come to San Diego to cheer us on and this is so amazing! Through all the things that my sisters and I have been through the last few years...well really our whole lives...they have always been there for us. We always knew if we needed them they would be there for us in a heartbeat. We were so fortunate to have our whole family in the same town growing up. Now that Becky and I have gone off to college and moved on with our lives it has taken us very far from home. I know one of the things we miss the most is being close to our family, but even though we live so far away we all still stay in contact (thanks facebook). I have been walking on the elliptical everyday but I still need to go for a 10 mile walk. I plan on finding a long trail this weekend and walking. I definitely miss my walking trails in Camas and the cooler weather. Off to another adventure....

(Breast Cancer Awareness Month is in October..dont forget to wear pink)

I still pick up the phone.

I have a confession. I was apprehensive and nervous about committing to the walk. After a week of soul searching and some gentle "encouragement” from Tish I finally faced my fears. 

It’s not the physical that scared me. I was so excited to push myself physically! I am a runner at heart but never a long distance runner. So now, I could push myself to achieve distances that I had not conquered before. Also, let’s be honest I needed a little kick in the booty to get physical again. After over 2 years of an amazing relationship my workouts are suffering. I ran when I was stressed. But the last 2 years I’ve been happy, content, and would much rather go on a dinner date with Brian or make dinner with him than sweat out a couple miles on the pavement. Whoops. But again, I needed that kick to get back in shape and healthy.

It wasn’t the organization that deterred me. ANY organization that promotes Breast Cancer (or any cancer) Awareness has my vote! I have a heart for the Susan G. Komen organization for two reasons. One, they promote awareness. We need all women checked for breast cancer. Any funds that go towards that will make an impact. Reason number two, and more importantly, they provide hope…specifically to my mom. Knowing there is an organization that makes it their mission to fight alongside of you gives more hope than words can explain. 

It wasn’t the financial commitment that made me nervous either. I have faith that Tish and I will both raise the required $2,300 each! 

Let me pause to say this…I’ve been writing this blog post in my head for weeks. I was torn about sharing some of my closest thoughts. However, so many of you have shown my sister and me such amazing support already, I thought it was only fair for me to go a little deeper. 

Selfishly, I was/am nervous about training alone. Tish is in Oregon and I am here in San Diego. Walking mile after mile after mile alone is so daunting and maybe a little boring. I love people. I don’t have a “hobby”. Hanging out with people is my hobby. I gain my strength being surrounded by others. So instead, to spend hours on my own walking…well, it didn’t sound fun. 

Fear number one leads to fear number two. All this time alone walking I feared would bring up painful feelings I didn’t know if I wanted to face. I knew that walking (for this cause) would make me think about Mom…actually thinking about Mom not being there. 

There it is. I said it. My greatest fears. They're not pretty, but you know what? I am facing them. Tish and I signed up for the walk and we are doing the training! 

The time alone is good and has been therapeutic. Yes, I could do some searching and find a walking group/buddy. But I thought for now, at least for the next few weeks I would embrace this training alone. I’ve actually enjoyed my alone time and truly feel refreshed. 

I do think about Mom a lot on those walks. I think a lot about how she isn’t here…but I use the time to talk to her. In my head I tell her all the things that I wanted to tell her when I reached for the phone to call her yesterday. (I don’t think the feeling of picking up the phone to call her will ever go away, and I hope it doesn’t). I talk to her about work, about the walk, my new pink walking shoes and my latest rehab project on a nightstand. In this time, I remember that this walk isn’t about me and my fears. It is about my sisters, my family, my mom’s friends, those fighting breast cancer and all those fighting with them or putting their lives back together after their loss. All that’s so much more important than me not liking to be alone, my own tears, or the pain in my hips. 

Mom was pretty great. And she left behind some pretty great daughters, mom, dad, sister, huge family and some lifelong friendships. She touched so many people…and still does to this day. My hope and prayer is that this walk and the money we raise will at least touch one person. That’s what this is about and that’s why I committed.

Sunday Funday

It's coming! The SGK 3day is a mere 2 1/2 months away.

Below is a little recap of my week!

All the training material has encouraged us to get a good pair of walking shoes. Below are my NEW walking shoes that I broke in on Sunday! I love shoe shopping...for tennis shoes. I went to Road Runner Sports (http://www.roadrunnersports.com)this week, and based on their analysis of my walk they chose these for me (I requested pink for the occasion) and also was fitted for a pair of custom insoles. They made of mold of my foot (apparently my arch is extremely high) and created an insole for me. It actually worked! Today was the first time I woke up after a walk without some major hip pain.

New Nike walking shoes!

Trail along Hwy 101 for my 6 miles on Sunday.

Stopped here at mile 3 to stretch and call Tish.

War wound. Sunburn matches my tank! 

Oh and here is a 'before' picture of the nightstand we "rehabbed" this weekend. :)